Our top story today is brainmeat.
Whether it's pushing up those busted up glasses that are taped at the bridge to read the most recent issue (well...recent being the one you most recently found as you scoured the wasteland) of "Programmer's Digest" or thinking up new ways to survive in the post-apocalypse, you just can't discount the importance of that that grey mush inside your head.
Without some semblance of brain power, you'll never be able to sentence a form proper! This could lead to some unfortunate circumstances! Consider all the horrible things that COULD happen in the vast, decimated city of Boston. You could get injured. Sure, that Deathclaw LOOKS cute and harmless but how do you feel AFTER he's removed the arm you used to try petting him? Probably pretty bad and in need of medical attention.
Let's say you're just cruising around, chowing on a delicious Squirrel on a Stick when all of the sudden you trip, fall and break your laser pistol. Now you're stuck with floor Squirrel on a Stick and no way to defend yourself! But wait! Taking a few minutes to read through a copy of "Dean's Electronics" might afford you enough smarts to fix it!